On Friday, March 31, Redditor u/Weak-Sand9779 took to r/AskReddit with a question for its 40.5 million members. “What is an unrealistic sexual fantasy/fetish that you have?” they mused in a post that has since garnered 18.3k upvotes.

The answer? A whole lot, especially when said kinks involve less-than-ideal venues.

“Definitely public sex but I am a rule follower and have way too much anxiety to ever act on anything like that lmao,” wrote u/peachbun11. Even less realistic was u/MsEvil_Doctor_Potter‘s desire to get boned in a way only Henry VII’s various wives could dream of.

“Wanna get screwed in a 15th-century style fantasy world by a rugged but sensitive man with a mysterious back story whose been paid to escort me across the country,” they explained. Dope.

Beyond logistical limitations, the laws of science and reality also play a role in how close one can get to fulfilling their deepest desires

“Being abducted by some rich demon or vampire and being their little slave or pet in exchange for money, gifts, and a cozy place to sleep,” wrote u/Roseburny. Uhhh.

And for u/ittybittylurker, our lack of cloning technology has proven an insurmountable obstacle to getting their freak on. “Basically I want to clone my husband,” they wrote. “You see, he has a very particular set of skills, skills he has acquired over a very long career, skills that make me wish he could be in 2 or 3 places at the same time.”

And u/ittybittylurker isn’t the only Redditor wishing one could be in multiple places at once, adding, “I would like to know the difference between a female orgasm and a male orgasm,” added u/Damerman.