11 Most Valuable (Non-Essential) Body Parts You Can Sell On The Black Market To Recoup Your Bitcoin Losses

mrlousyjeans Published 02/11/2024 in Funny

So you've lost all of your savings buying cryptocurrency at their ATH (all time high) price, and now you're scrambling to figure out how to pay your mortgage? Well, why don't you have a seat over here so we can discuss your options.

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1.
Kidneys - $200,000. 75% of Black Market organ trade involves the sale of a kidney due to diabetes, high blood pressure and heart problems. It’s worth noting that these are much cheaper ($15,000-$60,000) in China and India.
2.
Bone Marrow - $23,000 per gram. Easily the most valuable part of your body that you can live without. While it's totally legal to donate bone marrow, it is illegal to sell.
3.
Small Intestine - $2,519. Technically you can live without your small intestine, but because it's responsible for absorbing nutrients from your foot, you'll have to get those nutrients via an IV the rest of your life.
4.
Pair of Eyeballs - $1,525. At least you'll never have to see another crypto crash, right?
5.
Gallblader - $1,129. You don't need this.
6.
Scalp - $607. It's not going to pay your mortgage, but maybe you'll be able to get the family car fixed.
7.
Spleen - $508. This one stinks too. Get rid of it.
8.
Shoulder - $500.
9.
Hand and Forearm - $385. Just make sure it's not your primary hand.
10.
Blood - $337 per pint. You have to wait 56 days between blood donations, so you better get going sooner than later.
11.
Skin - $10 per square inch. No word on if they'll still pay that much for skin with Smash Mouth tattoos.

1.
Kidneys - $200,000. 75% of Black Market organ trade involves the sale of a kidney due to diabetes, high blood pressure and heart problems. It’s worth noting that these are much cheaper ($15,000-$60,000) in China and India.
2.
Bone Marrow - $23,000 per gram. Easily the most valuable part of your body that you can live without. While it's totally legal to donate bone marrow, it is illegal to sell.
3.
Small Intestine - $2,519. Technically you can live without your small intestine, but because it's responsible for absorbing nutrients from your foot, you'll have to get those nutrients via an IV the rest of your life.
4.
Pair of Eyeballs - $1,525. At least you'll never have to see another crypto crash, right?
5.
Gallblader - $1,129. You don't need this.
6.
Scalp - $607. It's not going to pay your mortgage, but maybe you'll be able to get the family car fixed.
7.
Spleen - $508. This one stinks too. Get rid of it.
8.
Shoulder - $500.
9.
Hand and Forearm - $385. Just make sure it's not your primary hand.
10.
Blood - $337 per pint. You have to wait 56 days between blood donations, so you better get going sooner than later.
11.
Skin - $10 per square inch. No word on if they'll still pay that much for skin with Smash Mouth tattoos.

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11 Most Valuable (Non-Essential) Body Parts You Can Sell On The Black Market To Recoup Your Bitcoin Losses

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Kidneys - $200,000. 75% of Black Market organ trade involves the sale of a kidney due to diabetes, high blood pressure and heart problems. It’s worth noting that these are much cheaper ($15,000-$60,000) in China and India.

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11 Most Valuable (Non-Essential) Body Parts You Can Sell On The Black Market To Recoup Your Bitcoin Losses

1.
Kidneys - $200,000. 75% of Black Market organ trade involves the sale of a kidney due to diabetes, high blood pressure and heart problems. It’s worth noting that these are much cheaper ($15,000-$60,000) in China and India.

2.
Bone Marrow - $23,000 per gram. Easily the most valuable part of your body that you can live without. While it's totally legal to donate bone marrow, it is illegal to sell.

3.
Small Intestine - $2,519. Technically you can live without your small intestine, but because it's responsible for absorbing nutrients from your foot, you'll have to get those nutrients via an IV the rest of your life.

4.
Pair of Eyeballs - $1,525. At least you'll never have to see another crypto crash, right?

5.
Gallblader - $1,129. You don't need this.

6.
Scalp - $607. It's not going to pay your mortgage, but maybe you'll be able to get the family car fixed.

7.
Spleen - $508. This one stinks too. Get rid of it.

8.
Shoulder - $500.

9.
Hand and Forearm - $385. Just make sure it's not your primary hand.

10.
Blood - $337 per pint. You have to wait 56 days between blood donations, so you better get going sooner than later.

11.
Skin - $10 per square inch. No word on if they'll still pay that much for skin with Smash Mouth tattoos.

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9 Comments

eBaum's Picks

1. Kidneys - $200,000. 75% of Black Market organ trade involves the sale of a kidney due to diabetes, high blood pressure and heart problems. It’s worth noting that these are much cheaper ($15,000-$60,000) in China and India.

2. Bone Marrow - $23,000 per gram. Easily the most valuable part of your body that you can live without. While it's totally legal to donate bone marrow, it is illegal to sell.

3. Small Intestine - $2,519. Technically you can live without your small intestine, but because it's responsible for absorbing nutrients from your foot, you'll have to get those nutrients via an IV the rest of your life.

4. Pair of Eyeballs - $1,525. At least you'll never have to see another crypto crash, right?

5. Gallblader - $1,129. You don't need this.

6. Scalp - $607. It's not going to pay your mortgage, but maybe you'll be able to get the family car fixed.

7. Spleen - $508. This one stinks too. Get rid of it.

8. Shoulder - $500.

9. Hand and Forearm - $385. Just make sure it's not your primary hand.

10. Blood - $337 per pint. You have to wait 56 days between blood donations, so you better get going sooner than later.

11. Skin - $10 per square inch. No word on if they'll still pay that much for skin with Smash Mouth tattoos.

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10.

11.

Share This Image

9 Comments

eBaum's Picks

1.
Kidneys - $200,000. 75% of Black Market organ trade involves the sale of a kidney due to diabetes, high blood pressure and heart problems. It’s worth noting that these are much cheaper ($15,000-$60,000) in China and India.

2.
Bone Marrow - $23,000 per gram. Easily the most valuable part of your body that you can live without. While it's totally legal to donate bone marrow, it is illegal to sell.

3.
Small Intestine - $2,519. Technically you can live without your small intestine, but because it's responsible for absorbing nutrients from your foot, you'll have to get those nutrients via an IV the rest of your life.

4.
Pair of Eyeballs - $1,525. At least you'll never have to see another crypto crash, right?

5.
Gallblader - $1,129. You don't need this.

6.
Scalp - $607. It's not going to pay your mortgage, but maybe you'll be able to get the family car fixed.

7.
Spleen - $508. This one stinks too. Get rid of it.

8.
Shoulder - $500.

9.
Hand and Forearm - $385. Just make sure it's not your primary hand.

10.
Blood - $337 per pint. You have to wait 56 days between blood donations, so you better get going sooner than later.

11.
Skin - $10 per square inch. No word on if they'll still pay that much for skin with Smash Mouth tattoos.