'Assume Everyone is An Idiot': 20 'Real Rules of the Road'

zachnading Published 03/07/2023 in cars

Driving clearly isn't meant for everyone. I don't want to throw out generic stereotypes, but let's just say people from New Jersey shouldn't be behind the steering wheel.

Thanks to the great folks over at AskReddit, we've compiled 20 of the best unwritten rules of the road. From merging advice to common sense safety tips, this is just day one stuff that any driver should know.

So before your girl smacks the next curb, show her these 'Real' rules of the road.

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1.
Don’t hang out in my blind spot! Either speed up and pass me, or slow down a bit. -towalip804
2.
Don't be nice, be predictable. What this means is, don't slam on your brakes to let someone else go, drive predictably. -Throwaway7219017
3.
The car with the most duct tape has the right of way... -DNA1976
4.
If it’s your turn to go at a four-way stop, then go. None of this “wave the other guy through” crap. You’re messing up the sequence. -bluebirdgm
5.
For the love of god, turn off your brights when you’re behind someone else. -A-rat-on-a-keyboard
6.
Assume everyone else is an idiot. -Lobdobyogi
7.
If everything else seems to be ok and people keep flashing their lights at you, something could be wrong with your car. Your hood may be unlached, door not closed properly, something stuck in door, piece of bodywork loose, flat tire. Find a nearest SAFE PLACE TO STOP and give your car a once-over. -fools_gambler2
8.
A light tap on the horn is a "heads up" and not an "eff you", so don't take it personal. -robtaylor30
9.
Be careful when opening the door after parking. Always look out for cyclists, other cars and buses. -koichita
10.
Merging onto a highway/interstate should be a very active process. Try to match the speed of traffic and fit into an open slot. Don't slow down to a crawl and wait for a wide berth. -Nonsenseinabag
11.
Always know what's around you! Know what cars are behind you or in the lane next to you. That way, if you feel you have to change lanes quickly you know whether you can or can't. -TheBubbleSquirrel
12.
If it’s raining put your God Damn lights on. No matter the time of day. -LemonHaze422
13.
It's written, but let's reiterate that the passing lane is for passing. -DahvRom
14.
Keep your cool. Road rage kills. -theomniconian
15.
At my old job I drove a box truck or a large cargo van. The thing about these vehicles is that they’re huge and they take a long time to brake. You have to start braking in advance. Additionally I have no view out the back.

What this means is that if you ride my ass and I start slowing down and you crash directly into the back of my truck your BMW will probably be totaled and you could be injured but my truck will be mostly fine. As far as insurance goes, good luck because it’s registered to my company who will fight tooth and nail to suck you dry of your money. I won’t suffer any consequences, and I didn’t even see you in the first place. So don’t get super close behind trucks. -hopefullyimnotsick
16.
Wear a seatbelt. -themanfromvulcan
17.
Put your blinker on before you start to break brake. Nothing drives me nuts like people who come to a full stop on a one lane road, and then put the blinker on while we wait for passing traffic. -towalip804
18.
There’s no shame in being the slower car. I’ve got pride…and a Jeep Wrangler. It handles like the Red October…just get out of the way and be slow and it’s fine. -Reasonable_Highway35
19.
Always leave yourself a way out. -WaffleHouseLove27
20.
Don’t trust a turn signal. -talikei

1.
Don’t hang out in my blind spot! Either speed up and pass me, or slow down a bit. -towalip804
2.
Don't be nice, be predictable. What this means is, don't slam on your brakes to let someone else go, drive predictably. -Throwaway7219017
3.
The car with the most duct tape has the right of way... -DNA1976
4.
If it’s your turn to go at a four-way stop, then go. None of this “wave the other guy through” crap. You’re messing up the sequence. -bluebirdgm
5.
For the love of god, turn off your brights when you’re behind someone else. -A-rat-on-a-keyboard
6.
Assume everyone else is an idiot. -Lobdobyogi
7.
If everything else seems to be ok and people keep flashing their lights at you, something could be wrong with your car. Your hood may be unlached, door not closed properly, something stuck in door, piece of bodywork loose, flat tire. Find a nearest SAFE PLACE TO STOP and give your car a once-over. -fools_gambler2
8.
A light tap on the horn is a "heads up" and not an "eff you", so don't take it personal. -robtaylor30
9.
Be careful when opening the door after parking. Always look out for cyclists, other cars and buses. -koichita
10.
Merging onto a highway/interstate should be a very active process. Try to match the speed of traffic and fit into an open slot. Don't slow down to a crawl and wait for a wide berth. -Nonsenseinabag
11.
Always know what's around you! Know what cars are behind you or in the lane next to you. That way, if you feel you have to change lanes quickly you know whether you can or can't. -TheBubbleSquirrel
12.
If it’s raining put your God Damn lights on. No matter the time of day. -LemonHaze422
13.
It's written, but let's reiterate that the passing lane is for passing. -DahvRom
14.
Keep your cool. Road rage kills. -theomniconian
15.
At my old job I drove a box truck or a large cargo van. The thing about these vehicles is that they’re huge and they take a long time to brake. You have to start braking in advance. Additionally I have no view out the back.

What this means is that if you ride my ass and I start slowing down and you crash directly into the back of my truck your BMW will probably be totaled and you could be injured but my truck will be mostly fine. As far as insurance goes, good luck because it’s registered to my company who will fight tooth and nail to suck you dry of your money. I won’t suffer any consequences, and I didn’t even see you in the first place. So don’t get super close behind trucks. -hopefullyimnotsick
16.
Wear a seatbelt. -themanfromvulcan
17.
Put your blinker on before you start to break brake. Nothing drives me nuts like people who come to a full stop on a one lane road, and then put the blinker on while we wait for passing traffic. -towalip804
18.
There’s no shame in being the slower car. I’ve got pride…and a Jeep Wrangler. It handles like the Red October…just get out of the way and be slow and it’s fine. -Reasonable_Highway35
19.
Always leave yourself a way out. -WaffleHouseLove27
20.
Don’t trust a turn signal. -talikei

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'Assume Everyone is An Idiot': 20 'Real Rules of the Road'

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20 Funny Memes to Kickstart Your Day

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Don’t hang out in my blind spot! Either speed up and pass me, or slow down a bit. -towalip804

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Categories: Science & Technology> Cars Road Rage Science & Technology> Trucks People & Lifestyle

Tags: wear_a_seatbelt driving_tips drivers_ed driving cars trucks rules_of_the_road askreddit subreddit reddit awful_drives high_beams passing_lane road_rules turn_signal

NEXT GALLERY 20 Funny Memes to Kickstart Your Day

1. Don’t hang out in my blind spot! Either speed up and pass me, or slow down a bit. -towalip804

2. Don't be nice, be predictable. What this means is, don't slam on your brakes to let someone else go, drive predictably. -Throwaway7219017

3. The car with the most duct tape has the right of way... -DNA1976

4. If it’s your turn to go at a four-way stop, then go. None of this “wave the other guy through” crap. You’re messing up the sequence. -bluebirdgm

5. For the love of god, turn off your brights when you’re behind someone else. -A-rat-on-a-keyboard

6. Assume everyone else is an idiot. -Lobdobyogi

8. A light tap on the horn is a "heads up" and not an "eff you", so don't take it personal. -robtaylor30

9. Be careful when opening the door after parking. Always look out for cyclists, other cars and buses. -koichita

10. Merging onto a highway/interstate should be a very active process. Try to match the speed of traffic and fit into an open slot. Don't slow down to a crawl and wait for a wide berth. -Nonsenseinabag

11. Always know what's around you! Know what cars are behind you or in the lane next to you. That way, if you feel you have to change lanes quickly you know whether you can or can't. -TheBubbleSquirrel

12. If it’s raining put your God Damn lights on. No matter the time of day. -LemonHaze422

13. It's written, but let's reiterate that the passing lane is for passing. -DahvRom

14. Keep your cool. Road rage kills. -theomniconian

16. Wear a seatbelt. -themanfromvulcan

17. Put your blinker on before you start to break brake. Nothing drives me nuts like people who come to a full stop on a one lane road, and then put the blinker on while we wait for passing traffic. -towalip804

18. There’s no shame in being the slower car. I’ve got pride…and a Jeep Wrangler. It handles like the Red October…just get out of the way and be slow and it’s fine. -Reasonable_Highway35

19. Always leave yourself a way out. -WaffleHouseLove27

20. Don’t trust a turn signal. -talikei

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7 Comments

eBaum's Picks

1.
Don’t hang out in my blind spot! Either speed up and pass me, or slow down a bit. -towalip804

2.
Don't be nice, be predictable. What this means is, don't slam on your brakes to let someone else go, drive predictably. -Throwaway7219017

3.
The car with the most duct tape has the right of way... -DNA1976

4.
If it’s your turn to go at a four-way stop, then go. None of this “wave the other guy through” crap. You’re messing up the sequence. -bluebirdgm

5.
For the love of god, turn off your brights when you’re behind someone else. -A-rat-on-a-keyboard

6.
Assume everyone else is an idiot. -Lobdobyogi

8.
A light tap on the horn is a "heads up" and not an "eff you", so don't take it personal. -robtaylor30

9.
Be careful when opening the door after parking. Always look out for cyclists, other cars and buses. -koichita

10.
Merging onto a highway/interstate should be a very active process. Try to match the speed of traffic and fit into an open slot. Don't slow down to a crawl and wait for a wide berth. -Nonsenseinabag

11.
Always know what's around you! Know what cars are behind you or in the lane next to you. That way, if you feel you have to change lanes quickly you know whether you can or can't. -TheBubbleSquirrel

12.
If it’s raining put your God Damn lights on. No matter the time of day. -LemonHaze422

13.
It's written, but let's reiterate that the passing lane is for passing. -DahvRom

14.
Keep your cool. Road rage kills. -theomniconian

16.
Wear a seatbelt. -themanfromvulcan

17.
Put your blinker on before you start to break brake. Nothing drives me nuts like people who come to a full stop on a one lane road, and then put the blinker on while we wait for passing traffic. -towalip804

18.
There’s no shame in being the slower car. I’ve got pride…and a Jeep Wrangler. It handles like the Red October…just get out of the way and be slow and it’s fine. -Reasonable_Highway35

19.
Always leave yourself a way out. -WaffleHouseLove27

20.
Don’t trust a turn signal. -talikei