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Dude is a Human Joystick In Roller Derby Tag

Jonathan is an absolute human joystick on roller blades, as he carves people up, and breaks their ankles in some sort of foam bat roller derby tag.

It's not fair for anybody to be this nimble, let alone in clunky four wheeled shoes. It looks like one of Jonathan's keys to juking is using the toes of the skates as regular shoes. To change direction on a dime, he digs his toes into the ground, and runs on them like they're not roller blades at all. Then, once he's built up a reasonable speed, he resumes skating. This way, he can accelerate and change direction in a way wheels never could. With roller derby skills like these, in 25 years, he might just be the coolest suburban dad of all time.
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